Video:What Is an Emotional Affair?

Transcript:What Is an Emotional Affair?

Hi. I’m Irina Firstein. I’m a couples therapist n New York City and I’m here for About.com. I’m going to explain what an emotional affair is.

Intimate Relationships May Be Emotional Affairs

In an emotional affair you are sharing feelings, time, conversations, with another person, that should be happening in your marriage. There is an intimacy that you feel with this person that goes beyond the kind of closeness and intimacy you feel with other people. And, it takes away from your relationship with your spouse. You would rather do that then be with your spouse. That’s when you know you’re crossing a line.

Emotional Affairs are Not Sexual

In my mind, there are a lot of similarities between an emotional affair and a traditional affair. The defining factor is the actual sexual interaction. And, everything else, is pretty much the same. Which is why it’s called an emotional affair.Most traditional affairs start out as an emotional affair. Basically, people get close and develop a relationship based on a common problem or an issue. Sometimes, it’s just an attraction and kind of there is a denial about the attraction. It’s kind of perceived as kind of a connection or closeness on some other level.Basically, an emotional affair if it goes on long enough becomes a sexual affair. It’s really a matter of time. Unless it’s recognized and stopped, if it’s given enough time, energy and attention, it will become an affair.

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